When an angry man behind me at the football today shouted in frustration at the ref "He's got a hold of his f***ing shirt man, it's a foul!" I was surprised that my friend looked so confused. She's a proper fan after all and I was just the lightweight along for the New Year FA cup match outing companion. And even I know you're not supposed to drag on the opposition's shirts to get them off the ball in football.

"What's his socks got to do with it?" she asked me, "and how's that a foul?"

Turns out she'd heard that he'd got a 'hole in his f***ing sock' which would seem an over eager reason for a yellow card! Or even a corner. It is nice how they have matching socks to their outfits though isn't it? And I've never seen a footballer with odd socks on. Maybe they're too big to get sucked into the vortex with the rest of the lost socks? Or perhaps they're provided with lots of spares? twenty two pairs in either white or blue, none of which had holes in as far as we could see.